Apr

23

God is bigger than your doubt

April 23, 2008 | Leave a Comment

Place your finger into the wound
Oh doubting Thomas
God is bigger than your doubt
(Although I could do without
Constant questions from a lout)

If you must
Insert your entire hand

The wound is large enough
Has bled enough for you
(And you and you
Those whom my words now anger)

Can you see my face Thomas
Many cannot but will believe
Not touch but have faith
Not ask why but love each other

And yet I love you Thomas
And those like you who come to me

I see your tears Thomas
Hear your fears whispered in the night

Yet you stand before me
Your finger at the ready

Go on place it in the wound
I will forgive your anguished cry of surprise
Did you not see the women weep by my cross
Mourn my earthly death
Heed not my words that I would return

God is bigger than your doubt

Jan

30

Discovering Ourselves in the Love of God

January 30, 2008 | Leave a Comment

St. Bernard of Clairvaux describes as the highest degree of love the love of ourselves for God’s sake. Thomas Merton calls this the high point of St. Bernard’s humanism which shows “that the fulfillment of our destiny is not merely to be lost in God, as the traditional figures of speech would have it, like a ‘drop of water in a barrel of wine or like iron in the fire’, but found in God in all our individual and personal reality” [and, ultimately,] “that we see his will done in us.”-The Genessee Diary, pg 85, Henri Nouwen

God’s love isn’t reserved for saints and mystics. It’s there for the clueless disciples, the reluctant prophets, and even those of us who doubt, who struggle with the most basic of human faults in ourselves. It doesn’t matter, you see. The love of God isn’t reserved for a special few.

I was once on a retreat. One of the retreat-ants went to talk to a priest and spent an entire twenty minutes complaining to him about her life. Knowing that her problems were more from her perception of things than actual issues, the priest said to her “We aren’t at this retreat to talk about our problems. We’re here to find spiritual solutions” and sent her to the chapel to pray, where she met me. I was deep in prayer when she came in and began complaining to me, as she had done the entire weekend, how no one understood her.

I’ve been on staff at retreats for terminally ill people and found them less challenging than this woman, who had an excellent career, good childhood and lacked nothing in material wealth. Her external circumstances just were meaningless to her however. All she could see was what she didn’t have and that one thing - not being married - caused her so much emotional pain that she dieted down to a size six. When that didn’t help her find the right person, she came to the retreat, full of grief. The way she showed that grief was to vent. It was very hard to be around her.

So there I sat in my wheelchair in the chapel, fresh back from a retreat with terminally ill people, praying for a dear friend who died from MS. Perhaps because of this I could see that she was grieving for the life she did not have. Many of us run into these feelings as we get older and discover that maybe we won’t get the education we need for that career we wanted or perhaps can’t have children or may have things happen in our lives we just don’t expect. What can happen is that we lose gratitude for what we do have and grieve for what we don’t. And we don’t get sympathy from others, but turn them away if we stay stuck there.

Her first words were “How could that priest understand what I’m going through? He can’t get married!” I almost laughed, but instead turned to her and said “You’re so sad that you haven’t found the right person to marry”, addressing her need openly. She nodded and began to cry, then leaned down and threw her arms around me, sobbing. “What’s wrong with me?” she asked. “I’ve done everything to make myself better and no one loves me.”

Gently, I told her that God loved her. She predictably scoffed at me, but I suggested that instead of feeling sad about the life she didn’t have, why didn’t she try to find ways to discover herself in God’s love while she waited to find the right person. She rubbed her eyes and looked at me as if I had lost my mind, but then she said “I suppose I have nothing to lose.” “And everything to gain,” I said. And I shared the above passage with her.

Two months later, I received a phone call from her. She told me that the plans we drew up at the retreat, which included volunteering and reaching out to others without making the goal finding a husband, were working out. “I like myself better,” she told me “and I made some new friends. In fact, I’m happier than I can remember being. I feel -” she hesitated- “loved, which was what I really wanted in the first place.”

And after spending ten minutes on the phone with her, I even liked her better! Gone was her venting and complaining, gone was her self pity. Instead she spoke about her new, exciting life and shared that she signed up for a few more trips to help people out. “I took a lot of what I have for granted,” she told me. “And I couldn’t see that because I couldn’t get out of myself.”

Someone probably could have told her that at the retreat, but that wouldn’t have helped her heal. What she needed was to feel lovable - even though many of us didn’t think there was much hope of that when we met her.

Jan

22

Catholic Carnival 156 is up

January 22, 2008 | Leave a Comment

here...

Jan

8

Catholic Carnival 154 is up

January 8, 2008 | Leave a Comment

here Happy New Year to everyone!

Dec

29

Catholic Carnival 152 is up

December 29, 2007 | Leave a Comment

….right here.

Dec

25

Bringing Christmas joy

December 25, 2007 | Leave a Comment

One woman has brought gifts to those forgotten by others every holiday for the past 11 years. In this article, she speaks of the real needs of those who have no one else, and how her work in a nursing home before retiring made her realize what she could do to help.

Dec

21

Spread the Love

December 21, 2007 | Leave a Comment

Here’s a song by Jon Weems, a musician with a disability. Please visit his website shown at the end of the video to hear more of his music or read about how he creates his music.

Dec

21

Catholic Carnival 151 is up-

December 21, 2007 | Leave a Comment

here

Dec

11

Homebound Catholics during the holidays

December 11, 2007 | Leave a Comment

“Where there is part, there is also the whole.”

When St. Alice contracted leprosy in her 20’s , she was no longer able to receive Communion from the chalice at her convent. She heard these words spoken to her by God, consoling her and reminding her that we are all part of the Communion of Saints ( the “living communion that exists between us and our brothers who are in the glory of heaven or who are yet being purified after their death. (”Lumen Gentium.” 51).

This time of year I receive quite a few emails from people who no longer can get to Mass or participate in a parish community. They so miss going to church. So I wanted to share these words as a reminder that God knows each of us and our situations and His love embraces us as we are, where we are - always.

Receiving Communion alone from a Eucharistic minister at home does not mean that you are not part of the whole. Just as St. Alice received Communion apart from others, she - and you - and all of us - are part of the Whole - the Body of Christ.

Nov

27

Catholic Carnival 147 is up-

November 27, 2007 | Leave a Comment

here.